I love the story of the first disciples in their boats, bummed out after a night of catching no fish. They know what they're doing; presumably, they've been at this awhile. Jesus says, Put the net in again, over there. I can only imagine their weary, heart-sore looks, even anger. What do YOU know about this? But they might as well, and then the net comes up: teeming, bursting with more fish than they know what to do with.
I give up easily. It's one of my character defects. I'm a natural-born quitter. If I were one of those fishermen, I'd probably have decided that not only is the lake empty, but I also suck at fishing. What's the point? Somebody comes along and says, Try it again, and it works. What makes the difference? I don't think there is a Magic Jesus Wand, that this story is literally true. But sometimes when we give up, somehow, some way, God doesn't. And God pushes us to try it again. It may not be that dramatic. But sometime, heart-sore and despairing, I have those small nudges to try one more time.
I am about to embark on a trip to the Holy Land with 13 fellow pilgrims. We are actually going to this Sea of Galilee, and other places "where Jesus walked". We're also going to be "where Jesus is walking now", to quote Peter Miano, one of our trip organizers. We're going to meet people who are working for peace and dialogue, justice and love. I've been nervous all week, convinced that God must've tapped the wrong girl on the shoulder t0 lead this, because I am so introverted and disorganized. Ain't no fish coming out of this effort, God - could I please change my mind? And she says, Nope. Put that net in again.
I pray for help, and what happens? Little things. The readings in my meditation books are remarkably spot on - including the fish story. A friend whom I have not heard from in months calls - not because she knows I'm going, but just because she misses me. And she was remarkably helpful. I remember my excitement. Suddenly everything I see and hear seems spiritually useful, emboldening and calming. Who knows where this bounty came from, but there is someone I suspect.
Pray for us, please. Pray that we can handle the big catch I suspect will be landing in our boat.
About Me
- Leap of Faith
- Writer, pastor, and collage artist, living in Delaware. I've been talking for years now about writing a book of meditations on the Gospels for religious liberals. It's the book I wanted to have when I became a Christian. For the time being, it's a blog that aspires to become a book. Thanks for the company as I write.
3 comments:
Wow, 19 long days since your last post - you were missed! You make me think about the scriptures in a new way. Hope you'll be blogging while on your trip to the Holy Land. I am praying for you and the group.
Thank you for this-as someone who tends to give up (on my own efforts) fairly easily as well, it is appreciated. Learning to surrender and to be receptive of those small moments you speak of makes all the difference.
Many blessings and my prayers are with you as you embark on your journey. BU
Barbara -- Your blogs resonate in my spirit. I ponder, struggle, and rejoice with you. Thank you for inspiring me to 'get my net in the water' again. I am coming off a month's leave of absence -- exhaustion being part of it, but know it's up to me to get my feet wet again. And once I do, to place my ear next to my heart -- where Jesus resides -- and listen to what he would have me to with the fishes (opportunities) that arise. Also to remind myself that I am not alone in this.....Jane
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